Lucky Home Run | August 2016

Somehow my luck made a turn around, I got a surprise on the 25th August. From last September to May I worked my butt off for a good grade for my first IGCSE. It was stressful, because in the run up to the exam I was having really nasty panic attacks. But all the stressing, long essays, few late nights and one all nighter, it has all came down to one very unexpected grade. I got an A.

I was predicted a B, my self doubt instantly kicked in the run up to results. What if it's a D. The exam was awful, distractions blaring out the widely-opened wicked windows - people screaming, two alarmed trucks and the twenty-minute something screeching styled car alarm. I'm sat there with my head embedded in my sweaty palms and realised I was going to have to do something I've never attempted to do.

I did something which I was told to do a long time ago. Switch the outside world off. I went through the exam one question at a time and imagined I was doing a fun yet challenging pub quiz. To my surprise it made the exam a little bit easier.

So I'm going to use this as my technique for the future because if I pretend I'm in a certain surrounding it tends to ease my anxiety levels massively.

Although when I finished the exam, I walked out with the MOST painful headache. I got the bus crying, I remember calling my mum telling all the things I thought I did wrong "I scratched the question book", "Scribbled over my awful spellings" - really winced down the phone on that one. "Oh mum I'll be lucky to get a D...", " So many distractions", "I didn't have a reader" - I was officially diagnosed with Dyslexia on 20th September 2015, my family used to make a slight joke about Christmas presents and we (including myself) said 'Dyslexia Diagnosis'. It took along time, but I got it for free with college during my time as a first year Fine Art student. I used to draw images if I couldn't spell something really simple.

I'm just so thrilled to have done better then expected, even to this day I'm still double checking I got an A in a subject which not super fantastic in. It feels so good to not have to study English and write scripts in my spare time.

In the mean time my dear, cheerio for now.